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Losing Confidence

I've had it all or so I thought. For the little acquired, I borrowed the rest. Needless to say, it was put to the test.

My skin grew thicker with every scab and coinciding bruise. If I could get away with it I'd be more likely to do it. I learned to tolerate a tear or two. I quit pointing fingers, started wiping my own a**, and refused to finish last. Though, I didn't mind it...

I joined athletics, flirted with cheerleaders, and earned a starting position. My steps turned into strides. My outfit tightened up as did my luck due to practice and progression.

My ways changed; direction, however, remained the same. My hours filled with study; sturdy and sure my mind worked. I had questions about everything but asked nothing. My grades were eh, and as for my attention, it was over there.

I tried, I did, and also quit. Commitment? Yes and no. Confident? Also yes and no!

The grass was green on my side, at least the grass I had. I was able and sensible, picking up everything I dropped including myself. My focus sharp as a thorn thanks to the desert and August thunderstorms. I was invincible, or so I thought.

All clouds pass as each day fades into the next, and much like my confidence, it all goes away.

Familiar to a cold, symptoms exist; I begin questioning my actions and thoughts. Sleeping to dream with hope, deprived of all three; yup, that was me!

My vision blurs as a mirage appears though I'm 20/20 according to the optometrist. Nowhere to be found, my confidence suddenly lost.


Instead of searching for what I once had, I decide to rebuild it stronger than ever! How, you ask?

I use the tools, skills, knowledge and resources familiar to that I know. Considering each lesson learned, every person met and scar earned, I begin to make way. I review all I've ever practiced. I observe my future and understand the past creating broad perspectives to rebuild confidence that lasts.


Next time you catch me smiling, remember, confidence is happy!


-Son of Mark

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